If you cannot ‘see’ yourself performing well, or living life without anxiety and fear, then you have very little chance of actually doing that, especially under pressure.

In this video, I share a powerful performance enhancement skill that, when practiced and applied, allows you to rehearse, review and focus on optimal performance in any stressful situation.

Click here to watch the short, but powerful, video.

The post (Video) Overcome Fear Through the Power of Visualization first appeared on Dr. Nick Lazaris.

“Sticks and Stones May Break My Bones, but Words Will Never Hurt Me.”

You’ve been lied to.

Maybe not intentionally, and probably by people who cared about you – teachers, parents, mentors. But still, it was a lie. And here it is:

“Words can’t hurt you.”

Not only can words hurt, but they have the power to shut down your dreams, limit your future, and slowly kill off your belief in what’s possible.

“Death and life are in the power of the tongue.” – Proverbs 18:21

I’ve worked with countless people over the years – artists, performers, entrepreneurs – who carry the weight of words spoken to them decades ago. Words that made them feel small, incapable, or not good enough. Words that still echo in their minds when they think about taking a leap or chasing a big dream.

But here’s what’s even more dangerous: the words we say to ourselves.

Yes, those quiet phrases you whisper internally. The doubts. The hesitations. The excuses disguised as logic. These are the real dream killers.

Below are five words and phrases that sabotage progress and passion. Recognize them. Replace them. And you’ll begin unlocking momentum toward the life and work you truly want.

1. “Wishing and Hoping”

This might sound harmless but wishing and hoping often become passive substitutes for doing. You wish for success. You hope things turn around. But unless those feelings are backed by action, nothing changes.

“Wishing and hoping won’t get you into his arms…” – Dionne Warwick

The same goes for your goals: they won’t land in your lap. They require courage, consistency, and risk. Wishing is fine to start – but make sure it leads to action.

2. “Maybe”

“Maybe I’ll try someday.”
“Maybe I’ll put myself out there.”
“Maybe I’m just not ready.”

“Maybe” is a comfort zone in disguise. It gives you a way out. It allows you to feel like you’re considering something while avoiding any real decision. But no dream ever takes shape in the fog of “maybe.”

If you want to create a life of purpose and passion, swap “maybe” for a bold “yes” or a clear “no”—anything that moves you forward with intention.

3. “What if…”

“What if I fail?”
“What if they don’t like it?”
“What if I’m not good enough?”

These future-based fears steal your presence and poison your momentum. Living in the “what ifs” robs you of the power to create in the now.

Try this: next time your brain throws out a fearful “what if,” answer it with a strong, grounded “So what?” Then take the step anyway. Action is the antidote to anxiety.

4. “Yes” (When You Really Mean No)

Saying “yes” to everything – opportunities, requests, other people’s dreams – might seem generous or ambitious. But when you overcommit out of fear, guilt, or the need to please, you end up drained and off-course.

Learning to say “no” is one of the most powerful tools for staying aligned with your own goals. Saying “no” isn’t rejection – it’s protection of your time, your energy, and your dream.

5. “Getting Ready…”

Ever catch yourself saying, “I just need to get ready,” again and again? Maybe you’re gathering tools, doing research, or waiting for the right moment.

Let’s be honest: “getting ready” can become a form of procrastination. Preparation is good – but over-preparing is often just fear in disguise.

Start before you’re ready. Take imperfect action. You’ll figure it out along the way, just like everyone else who’s ever built something worthwhile.

Final Thoughts

If you’re chasing a dream – whether as a creative, a speaker, an entrepreneur, or anything else—your inner words matter. They can move you forward or hold you hostage.

Here’s the good news: The words that limit you are in your control. Change the script, and you change your trajectory.

So today, notice what you’re saying to yourself. Start catching the phrases that keep you small. Then replace them with words that encourage, empower, and energize your next step.

What words or phrases do you tend to say to yourself that quietly sabotage your dreams? What new words could you choose instead.

If performance anxiety, fear of public speaking, or anxiety in ANY pressure situation creates stress (and even panic!) then here is a powerful resource you will want to check out and take advantage of. If you are ready to challenge your anxiety and begin to overcome your limiting beliefs, then let’s schedule a Free Coaching Call to explore how I might assist you.

Simply click here to learn more about this powerful opportunity.

The post The Words That Kill Dreams – and What to Do About Them (Part 1) first appeared on Dr. Nick Lazaris.

Public speaking or performing can be both exciting and nerve-wracking. While engaging with an audience is important, focusing too much on their reactions can be distracting and take away from your ability to deliver an authentic and effective speech. Here’s how you can stay present in the moment and confidently deliver your message without getting caught up in audience responses.

1. Re-frame Your Mindset

Instead of viewing your presentation as a performance that needs approval, see it as a conversation or an opportunity to share valuable insights. Your role is to deliver your message, not to control how every audience member reacts. When you shift your focus from seeking validation to serving your audience, you naturally become more present.

2. Trust Your Preparation

Confidence comes from preparation. The more you rehearse your speech, the more comfortable you’ll feel delivering it. When you know your content thoroughly, you reduce the need to gauge audience reactions for reassurance. Instead, you can focus on delivering your message with clarity and conviction.

3. Develop a Pre-Speaking Ritual

A pre-speech routine can help you center yourself before stepping on stage. This could include deep breathing exercises, visualization, affirmations, or stretching. These rituals can help calm your nerves and shift your focus from external reactions to internal confidence.

4. Engage in Mindfulness Techniques

Mindfulness helps you stay present and fully engaged in the moment. Simple techniques like focusing on your breath, feeling the ground beneath your feet, or taking a brief pause before speaking can keep you grounded. If you notice yourself getting distracted by audience reactions, gently bring your focus back to your speech.

5. Stay Connected to Your Message

One of the best ways to stay present is to immerse yourself in your message. Rather than worrying about how the audience perceives you, focus on the content you are delivering. The more connected you are to your words and ideas, the less room there is for distractions.

6. Adopt a “Flow” Mentality

Many speakers describe being in a “flow state,” where they become fully engaged in their delivery and lose track of self-conscious thoughts. To achieve this state, focus on the rhythm of your speech, your body language, and the passion behind your message rather than the audience’s reactions.

7. Let Go of the Need for Control

You cannot control how every audience member reacts. Some may be engaged, while others may seem uninterested or distracted. Rather than trying to win everyone over, trust that your message will resonate with those who are ready to receive it. Focus on delivering with confidence, regardless of individual reactions.

8. Embrace Imperfection

A fear of making mistakes often leads speakers to seek reassurance from the audience. Accept that no speech will be perfect, and that’s okay. If you stumble over a word or lose your train of thought, take a deep breath and continue. Most audience members won’t notice small mistakes unless you draw attention to them.

9. Detach from Praise and Criticism

If you rely too much on applause or positive reactions, negative responses may affect you more deeply. Learn to appreciate feedback without letting it dictate your self-worth as a speaker. Constructive criticism is a tool for growth, while praise is a sign that your message is resonating—but neither should define your confidence.

10. Speak for the Love of It

At the heart of every great speech is passion. Remind yourself why you are speaking in the first place. When you focus on sharing ideas that matter to you rather than seeking approval, you naturally stay more present and engaged.

Staying present as a public speaker requires a shift in mindset, trust in preparation, and mindfulness techniques. By focusing on your message rather than audience reactions, you can deliver speeches that are more authentic, impactful, and fulfilling. The best speakers are those who stay in the moment, trust their expertise, and speak from the heart.

If performance anxiety, fear of public speaking, or anxiety in ANY pressure situation creates stress (and even panic!) then here is a powerful resource you will want to check out and take advantage of. If you are ready to challenge your anxiety and begin to overcome your limiting beliefs, then let’s schedule a Free Coaching Call to explore how I might assist you.

Simply click here to learn more about this powerful opportunity.

The post Speak Like No One’s Watching! first appeared on Dr. Nick Lazaris.

“Many people die with their music still in them. Why is this so? Too often it is because they are always getting ready to live. Before they know it, time runs out.” ~ Oliver Wendell Holmes

• Do you dream of presenting or performing without fear but get stuck in “What if” thinking?
• Do you hold back from taking bold steps because of what others might think?
• Do you find yourself always preparing but never fully stepping out?

If you answered “Yes” to any of these questions, you’re not alone. So many speakers and performers—public speakers, actors, dancers, singers, comedians—struggle with the fear of looking foolish, making mistakes, or being judged. I’ve been there myself.

Let me tell you a story.

The Night I Learned to Dance

It was during my Doctoral Internship at a hospital in Georgia when a group of nurses and interns invited me out for the evening. After a long, draining day, I thought, Why not? A little dinner and laughter sounded like just what I needed.

But when we pulled up to one of the hottest dance clubs in the city, panic set in. You see, I had never danced before. Sure, I’d done a little Greek dancing at family weddings, but a packed nightclub with pulsating disco music? No way.

My overthinking had always “protected” me from looking ridiculous on a dance floor.

There was no escape. No car to leave in. No way out.

And then it happened. One of my friends pulled me from my chair, dragged me to the dance floor, and said, “It’s time to dance.”

I froze. Absolutely paralyzed. My mind raced with worry about how I’d look and what others would think. Then someone in the crowd shouted, “Go for it, Nick! Show us what you’ve got!”

In a moment of desperation, I closed my eyes.

And something shifted.

With my eyes shut, I let go of the fear of being judged. I started moving. When I opened my eyes, I froze again. But with my eyes shut, I felt free. I started to think, Who cares what they think? So what? Just dance!

Eventually, my eyes stayed open, and I kept moving. Was I a great dancer? Not even close. But I was dancing.

When I returned home from my Internship several months later, I invited friends out to dance. They were shocked. “What happened to you?” they asked.

I told them: I closed my eyes and decided it was time to dance.

What’s Keeping You from Taking the Stage?

What fears are holding you back? Are you worried about forgetting your lines, freezing as you present yourself, missing a note, or fumbling a routine? Are you afraid someone might laugh or critique you?

Here’s the truth: every performer faces this crossroads. You can either stay seated in fear or get up and dance.

When you stop worrying about how others see you, you step into the freedom of your art. And the world needs what only you can bring.

Close Your Eyes. Step Into the Spotlight.

It’s time to stop waiting. Stop second-guessing. Stop letting fear dim your light.

Question: In what ways are you holding yourself back from fully stepping into your performance? How has that held you back from achieving what truly matters?

Now, close your eyes and take the stage. It’s time to dance.

If fear, anxiety, or stress have held you back from achieving the things that matter to you, then check out my community, the Fearless for Life Academy, by clicking here.

The post Step Into the Spotlight – It’s Time to Dance! first appeared on Dr. Nick Lazaris.

These days, video content is everywhere – virtual meetings, online presentations, vlogs, social media stories – you name it. But let’s be honest: being in front of the camera can feel super intimidating.

You might feel awkward, overly critical of how you look or sound, or just unsure of what to do. The good news? You’re not stuck with this anxiety. With a few mindset shifts and some practice, you can go from dreading the camera to feeling comfortable (and maybe even enjoying it).

Here’s how to start overcoming your camera anxiety:

1. Understand Where the Fear Comes From

First, ask yourself: What’s making you nervous? Are you worried about looking or sounding awkward? Do you think people will judge you? Are you afraid of making mistakes? Pinpointing the root of your anxiety can make it easier to address. For example, If you’re worried about judgment, remind yourself that most people are too busy thinking about themselves to critique you.

2. It’s All About Mindset

Instead of seeing the camera as a source of stress, think of it as a way to connect with others. Whether you’re sharing a message, capturing a memory, or simply showing up for a meeting, the camera is your tool for communication. Shift your focus from “How do I look?” to “What do I want to share?”

3. Start Small and Practice Often

No one expects you to be a pro from the get-go. Start with low-pressure practice. Record yourself on your phone, talk to your webcam, or snap a few selfies. Watch them back (yes, this part can be challenging at first) and look for things you like about your delivery. Over time, this will help you build confidence and feel more natural in front of the camera.

4. Plan, but Don’t Overthink It

Being prepared can ease a lot of anxiety. If you’re recording a video, jot down key points or rehearse what you want to say. For photos, think about poses or outfits that make you feel good. But don’t stress over being perfect – natural moments often resonate more than perfectly scripted ones.

5. Get Comfortable with “Messing Up”

Here’s a secret: nobody expects you to be perfect, and mistakes are completely normal. Stumble over your words? Laugh it off and keep going. Make a weird face? Roll with it. People appreciate authenticity, and those little imperfections make you relatable. Comparing our real selves to those polished, picture-perfect images we see all over the internet only adds fuel to the fire, creating an impossible standard that feeds our anxiety.

6. Find What Makes You Feel Confident

Your comfort level often comes down to how you feel about yourself. Wear clothes that make you feel good. Experiment with lighting and angles that flatter you. Practice smiling! When you feel confident, it shines through on camera.

7. Use Relaxation Techniques

Feeling jittery? Take a few deep focused breaths before you hit record. Try visualization, stretching, meditating, or listening to music to calm your nerves. A relaxed body and mind make a world of difference when you’re on camera. Try some mindfulness exercises like deep breathing and visualization to calm those jitters before you hit record.

8. Focus on the Bigger Picture

Remember why you’re doing this. Whether you’re filming for work, connecting with friends, or capturing a moment, it’s not about being perfect- it’s about showing up. Focus on the purpose behind being on camera, and let that be your motivation.

9. Don’t Be Afraid to Get Help

If your anxiety feels overwhelming, don’t hesitate to get support. Work with an anxiety coach or even a friend who can help guide you. They can offer tips, encouragement, and constructive feedback to make the process easier.

10. Celebrate Your Progress

Even small wins are worth celebrating. Did you finally record that Instagram video? High-five yourself. Show up confidently for a Zoom call? That’s a win. Over time, these little victories will add up and make a huge difference in how you feel about being on camera. Although it might seem overwhelming, remember, every video experience is a chance for you to grow.

You’ve Got This

Being on camera doesn’t have to feel like a chore or a source of anxiety. It’s an opportunity to share who you are and connect with others. Start with small steps, be kind to yourself, and remember: confidence isn’t about being perfect – it’s about showing up as you are.

So go ahead, take that first step. Hit record. Smile. And remind yourself that you’re capable of more than you think.

If fear, anxiety, or stress have held you back from achieving the things that matter to you, then check out my community, the Fearless for Life Academy, by clicking here.

The post Overcome Your Anxiety of Being on Camera first appeared on Dr. Nick Lazaris.

Have you ever felt like you’re not good enough, even when all the evidence says otherwise? Like you’re just waiting for someone to figure out you’re a fraud?

If that sounds familiar, you’re not alone. What you’re feeling might be imposter syndrome – a sneaky mindset that can hold you back from fully embracing your success.

In my coaching work, I’ve found imposter syndrome to be one of the biggest barriers to reaching your full potential, whether it’s at work, in a creative endeavor, or in life overall. So, I want to talk about what imposter syndrome really is, how it can impact you, and most importantly, how to break free from it to unlock your best self.

What is imposter syndrome, really?

Think about this: You give a well-received presentation, crush a big project, or create something you’re truly proud of. But instead of celebrating, you catch yourself wondering, “Did I really deserve this?” You might chalk it up to luck or assume people are overestimating you.

That’s imposter syndrome – feeling like you’re faking it and fearing you’ll be found out, even when you’ve clearly earned your achievements.

And here’s the thing – it doesn’t just mess with your head; it messes with your performance too. Imagine a gifted musician too afraid to perform because they think they’re not good enough. Or a business person speaking at work and thinking that they were so lucky that they did not mess up, that it was some sort of fluke. That kind of thinking puts the brakes on your potential. It keeps you stuck, hesitant to take risks, or even acknowledge your worth.

The good news? You can beat it.

You don’t have to stay trapped in this cycle of doubt. Here are a few strategies to help you stop experiencing imposter syndrome:

1. Call it out: Start by recognizing when those self-doubt patterns creep in. Remind yourself that many successful people experience imposter syndrome. It’s not a reflection of your abilities – just a mindset to tackle.
2. Re-frame the narrative: When negative thoughts pop up, challenge them. Instead of focusing on what you think you lack, highlight your wins, skills, and hard work. Celebrate your success – you’ve earned it.
3. Lean on your people: You’re not in this alone. Talk to friends, mentors, or a coach who can help you see yourself more clearly. Sometimes, an outside perspective is just what you need to shake off self-doubt.
4. Set small, doable goals: Big dreams can feel overwhelming. Break them down into bite-sized milestones and celebrate every step forward. Progress, no matter how small, deserves recognition.
5. Be your own cheerleader: Treat yourself with kindness. Nobody’s perfect, and making mistakes is part of the journey. Take care of yourself – body, mind, and soul – and give yourself credit where it’s due.

The bottom line? You’re more than enough.

Imposter syndrome doesn’t have to define you. Believe in your abilities, own your accomplishments, and take one step at a time toward confidence. It’s a process, sure – but with patience and persistence, you’ll get there.

So, take off that mask. The world is ready for the real you – the one brimming with talent, potential, and brilliance. You’ve got this. Let’s leave imposter syndrome in the dust and go make great things happen.

If fear, anxiety, or stress have held you back from achieving the things that matter to you, then check out my community, the Fearless for Life Academy, by clicking here.

The post From Fraud to Fearless: Overcoming Imposter Syndrome first appeared on Dr. Nick Lazaris.

The Holiday Season is a time for joy! Yet, this can be a most difficult time of the year for many. Stress, pressure, loneliness, expectations, depression, hurts and financial burdens rob many of the joy of the season.

With Christmas seeming to come earlier each year (ornaments on sale in July!) and the mad rush of traffic and the scramble to buy the ‘perfect’ gifts, the “Happy Holidays” often turn out to be anything other than joyful or happy!

It has been said that “we are in danger of losing Christmas.” This is even true for those who are faith-based who, in the rush of things, lose that “glad feeling of happiness and delight” that should be at the center of the holidays.

The challenge is that in order to handle the unique pressure and stresses that accompany this time of year, we need to maintain a ‘balanced life.”

Problems that occur in our desire to experience joy are when our “whole being” is out of balance.

Let’s take a quick look at some very practical steps that we can take towards putting the joy back into Christmas:

1) Prepare Your Physical Self for the Holidays

~ Eat wisely – importance of healthful, nourishing foods (although a very hard time to diet!)

~ Rest appropriately – set boundaries on shopping, visiting and decorating – give your body time to refresh itself!

~ Exercise – “not something you spend time doing, but rather something you invest time in”

~ Strive for ‘Stress-Free’ living – Give yourself permission to slow down and enjoy yourself; practice positive self-talk; avoid comparing yourself to others; see yourself as a valuable child of God; give yourself permission to take risks

2. Evaluate Your Soul (Your emotional/relational self)

~ Evaluate your expectations and give them up to God – “idealized holidays” can set us up for unfulfilled expectations (false TV and social media images); continually check out your expectations and let them go

~ Set priorities for the holidays – Ask yourself, “What is REALLY important?”; Learn to say “No”; Build your own holiday traditions (make then uniquely YOURS!)

~ Keep things in financial perspective – Develop a reasonable spending plan and stick to it; Communicate limitations to your children (align their expectations with reality); avoid the ease of buying on credit (which discourages creativity and planning and can lead to financial bondage)

~ Decide to resolve hurtful feelings – examine and resolve any lack of forgiveness towards others; forgive yourself (let go of unresolved guilt & shame); recognize and work on pain from the past (hurts and losses)

~ Experience the childlike joy of Christmas – be yourself; be spontaneous; rid yourself of perfectionism; develop the eyes, ears and mouth of a child – look at Christmas differently … listen with new ears … be silly … have fun!

3. Focus on the Miracle of Christmas

~ Don’t neglect your spiritual needs; plan to make the holidays a time of spiritual and emotional growth; real joy, especially as a faith-based person, comes from the realization of what Christmas is really all about and from knowing the one whose birth we celebrate, as Paul in scripture wrote so many years ago, “Thanks be to God for His indescribable gift!”

During this Holiday season I encourage you to:

~ Prepare yourself physically

~ Evaluate the expectations you have for the Season

~ Set realistic priorities

~ Evaluate your emotional and relational life

~ Set your inner child free to fully enjoy the season!

~ Focus on the Miracle of Christmas

If fear, anxiety, or stress have held you back from achieving the things that matter to you, then check out my community, the Fearless for Life Academy, by clicking here.

The post Stop Letting Stress & Anxiety Steal Your Holiday Joy – Part 2 first appeared on Dr. Nick Lazaris.

Life is not simple. In fact, if you are challenged with anxiety, whether it is caused by a fear of speaking, getting on a stage, going to a social event or simply feeling overall safe in the world, overcoming your fears can feel overwhelming.

Most will avoid the situation that triggers the fear – “If I don’t go to the event or speak in front of others, then I won’t get anxious.”

You know what? That strategy works. Every time. Yet, there is usually a price to be paid for avoiding situations that are important to our career, business or life in general.

I’d like to suggest that you adopt a new formula whenever you find yourself frozen with fear and having a decision to make.

E + R = O

This is a formula I learned from Jack Canfield (author of the Chicken Soup for the Soul book series) during a training with him years ago.

At first it may seem too simple yet, as I will share, it can be a powerful formula to apply in any situation that creates stress.

E is the Event (or Experience) – For example, you are asked to make a presentation at work. It is simply an event. It has no emotions connected to it either in a negative or positive way.

R is your Response to the Event – It is here that we get ourselves in trouble. It is also the key part of the formula. How we respond to the event will always lead to the outcome.

O is the Outcome – Remember that the outcome, in terms of experiencing fear and anxiety, is always a result of how we respond to the event or experience itself. No event can ’cause’ anxiety – only what we tell our self will matter.

The principle described in this formula is that no matter what happens to or around you, the one thing that is ALWAYS available to you is your ability to CHOOSE your response to what is happening.

It is always the response that you choose that leads to the final outcome you experience.

Using the example of giving a presentation at work, if your response is, “I’m going to get so anxious that they will see that I’m nervous…I might blank out…I will look stupid.” This response will actually create more anxiety!

A different response to the event, such as “I might get nervous, but I am going to practice my focused breathing skill this week and remind myself that I intend to stay as focused as possible as I work on managing my anxiety and becoming a better speaker,” will lead to a very different outcome.

You cannot always control the events in your life. However, the response to those events are always under your control. It is not always easy, but it is always under your control to choose how you will begin to respond.

While change and learning new responses can feel scary at first and leave us feeling that we are not enough, taking charge of your responses in events associated with anxiety will begin to lead to very different outcomes than if one believes things are happening TO them.

Albert Schweitzer once said, “Man must cease attributing his problems to his environment (the event) and learn again to exercise his will – his personal responsibility (his response)”

Whether in your business, in your creative process or in a performance, the decision to take responsibility of your responses and turn potential powerlessness and fear into action will always lead to a more positive outcome.

This week I encourage you to look for opportunities to apply this formula of E+R=O. Commit to intentionally responding differently.

You CAN change the outcome.

(Ready to change the way that you manage your fears? Click here to learn more about the Fearless for Life Academy and how you can join for FREE)

The post A Formula That Can Change Your Life! first appeared on Dr. Nick Lazaris.